Musings…Reflections…Thoughts by TK

My life. My journey. My version. The way I see it.

Hallmark Holidays February 14, 2011

Filed under: Uncategorized — thoughtsbytk @ 9:52 am

Have I ever mentioned that I hate Valentine’s Day? I spent many of them with only my mother as a Valentine. I’m sure that I would have felt differently had I actually had dates or boyfriends for it. I was so averse to it by the time I got married that I made a pact with my husband that we would never celebrate it. Somehow though, every now and then, a Valentine’s Day card sneaks its way into our lives…..and I always totally love it. And I totally shouldn’t. But it kinda makes up for all those times I spent it alone or out with girlfriends who were also alone. It’s just a card, right? It’s not like we went out and spent enormous amounts of money on chocolates and flowers and dinners like they would like us to. I like to do those things all year, not just because it’s a certain day. Plus? Julls birthday is the 16th. I’d rather celebrate that.

Speaking of Valentine’s Day with girlfriends. I’m meeting one of mine for lunch today. We both have an affection for chinese food. Jennifer was one of the first people I met when we moved here to Germany. We were both pregnant, both love to shop, and both love to eat chinese food. It was meant to be. Her son Dominick is 3 months older than Fiona. Its been fun to have someone here to share the baby experience with. She’s fun and cute and I’m glad I have her.

Which brings me to my other friend Kim. I’m pretty sure I’ve posted about her before. I love her. She often says things to me from a totally different perspective that I had thought about. She also is a great mom. I try to take cues from her every now and then. She handles things very differently from me, and for the better. God gives us the people in our lives for all different reasons. With her, I know exactly the reasons why, and I am thankful. I’m writing about her now because as I am typing in my blog, I am wondering how she’s doing with hers. She finally decided to start one and was very excited about it when we spoke this morning.

Fiona…….what a little drama queen. I gave her bananas this morning to feel herself for the first time. She made a huge mess with them and whined until I got up and grabbed a fork to feed her myself. She was happy with this. Two weeks until her first birthday but I think she’s perfectly happy still being a baby. Maybe that’s why she won’t pull up. She’s cool still being a baby. I’m cool with that too. They grow up so fast anyway.

And Felix…..Lord….Monday mornings are a mess!!! He wakes up cranky and needy and acts as if he can’t function without me. I’m less ok with this. He’s a young child and I’m cool with him wanting to be a young child but he’s not helpless. I try to be patient with him but I usually end up losing my cool and yelling at him, then feeling guilty about it until he comes off the bus in the afternoon unscathed and acting as if it never happened that morning. But I know it did. Then I dote on him to make up for it. Really need to break that cycle.

Need to break a lot of cycles. Its hard not to become your parents. I don’t want to be my parents. They may have loved me but the life I had was really messed up. Love wasn’t enough. Lots of other things are required when raising well-balanced children. Julls and I are both way off-balance, luckily when you put one of us at each end of the scale, it levels out. That’s why God brought us together I think. He’s the yin to my yang. We need one another. It just works.

Happy Valentine’s Day!


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